In school students are compared by their GPAs. Athletes are compared by how fast they can run or how consistently they can score. Socially, you are judged by how many followers you have or how many likes you get on a post. How hard you work is judged by your salary. I don’t know about you, but there are days when I feel suffocated by all of the numbers. Sometimes I wonder if being a good friend or a hard worker even matters anymore. Are quantitative scores the only thing that matter??
Absolutely not. Here’s why:
The realms where you get “graded” are not where your happiness should stem from
If your happiness is derived from how much you get paid, your GPA, or your fastest mile time, I promise that you are missing out on the most beautiful parts of life. I have been on the top of the mountain and in the depths of the valley numerous times academically, athletically, financially (mainly valleys), and socially according to Instagram or Facebook. What makes those tough times bearable are the relationships built through the intangibles. What do I mean by intangibles? I’m talking about the fuzzy parts of life that society does not put a lot of value on such as being honest, reliable, giving, humble, and loving.
Not all competition is healthy
Some competition makes you better by pushing you to your own personal limits. Some competition makes you look better by making those around you look worse. In the past few years I have seen both sides of that. I have seen so much growth through competition and I have seen so much selfish betrayal. When your focus strays from the intangibles to those quantified measurements, I can assure you that the temptation to climb the ladder by stepping on those around you will be overwhelming.
In college, most classes were graded on a curve. During my first few semesters, it blew my mind that classmates would refuse to help me on homework or share a study guide with me. Then one day I realized that in order for them to succeed when classes are graded on a curve, they only had to make their grade higher than those around them. Part of their competitive strategy was to deprive other students of the resources they possessed. While this tactic was effective for them, it shows a clear concentration on personal quantifiable success through holding others down.
Don’t get caught up on the pressure of a quantitative world. Focus on the intangibles and share that dang study guide.
XOXO,
Kay